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Friday, July 22, 2005

Grab the bull by the, um, ya know

I decided to catch up on some WPT events which have been waiting patiently on my Tivo. The first was the Bay 101 Shooting Stars tournament, which Phil Gordon won. I like Phil Gordon, so that was nice. Chris Moneymaker was one of the targeted pros, and he mentioned in one of his interviews that he continues to work as an accountant, and only plays poker part time. I did not know that. I've been known to call Moneymaker a one-hit wonder, since he hasn't really won since the 2003 WSOP. If he's only playing a handful of tournaments per year, then that makes sense. I apologize to Chris for my unwarranted bashing, should he ever stop by this blog.

The other event was from The Mirage and Gabe Kaplan was at the final table. I'm past the whole "Kotter" thing, and I know he's been playing for many years. I was shocked by the passive style of play he adopted. I know he can't have played that way through the whole tournament, and sitting at a table with Scotty Nguyen, John Juanda and Eli Elezra is tricky, but he sure allowed a lot of free cards. Still, he finished 3rd, so what do I know?

When it got down to Elezra and Watkinson heads-up, Elezra flopped a pair of aces, and slowplayed them against Watkinson, who had nothing (or close to nothing. It's hard to remember). The turn came a rag, and Elezra continued to slowplay it. At this point, Vince Van Patten says, "He did it before and he's doing it again. He's going to milk it like a bull."


Vince Van Patten cracks me up. He's the finest hipster doofus on television since Kramer. Many of his nicknames for hands don't make sense. One of my favorite local commercials is for a casino here. Vince Van Patten strolls up in his fancy suit, sans tie, shirt open a couple buttons at the collar. "If you can't spot the sucker at the table, youuuuurrrre it," he confides. "Ruuuulllllle number one in the great game of poker." A little later, he quips, "Got crocodile blood? You're gonna need it."

However, milking a bull seems a little beyond his scope of goofiness. Thanks to the miracle of Tivo, I was able to go back and listen again, hearing that he actually said "holstein." Well, that's a little better. Not as funny as bull, though.